Hiiii!
Learning a new language can be exciting and overwhelming all at the same time. It can be so fun to talk to people in another language. It’s especially exciting when you feel like you’re starting to understand the conversations around you. But something that can be difficult to learn before it’s too late, is to respectfully set boundaries.
Most of my vocabulary is made up of all positive responses, I don’t have as many negative words – aside from the usual handful of curse words. When I get into conversations I could happily describe how pretty something is or tell you about the day. But if I need to describe it with a more negative connotation, I usually pull words like feo (ugly) or malo (bad). And I struggle when I need to describe things beyond that.
I’m sure you can imagine that means I struggle when I try to respectfully set boundaries too. I’ve got the word “no” down of course, but how do I go beyond that? Let’s learn a little something together, shall we? Let’s learn how to set some boundaries to protect our mental and physical health, as well as just to protect our time.
Now let’s get into it!
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Communicate Clearly and Directly
Expressing your boundaries clearly and directly is key.
It’s easy when you’re learning Spanish to think you need to over-explain yourself to be understood. And instead of being clear and direct, we get lost in trying to find the right words to make sure they know what we’re saying.
Try not to overthink it. Get your thought out. Set your boundary, and then, maybe ask if they understand you. Because if they don’t they’ll be sure to tell you. Instead of overexplaining and making a mess of the boundary-setting conversation, be direct and straight to the point.
Consider using phrases like:
- I don’t want to talk about this – No quiero hablar de esto
- I’m not comfortable discussing this – No me siento cómodo/a hablando de esto
Then ask them if they understood:
- Do you understand me? – Me entendieste?
- Does that make sense? – entiendes a lo que me refiero?
Remember to watch your tone of voice when you ask these questions or make those statements. Being clear and direct doesn’t come without manners.
Learn to Say “No”
Learning to say “no” respectfully is vital. And on that note, hold firm to your answer! No means no. Don’t let anyone argue with you on this. You don’t need to be rude in your answer. A simple “No gracias” is fine. If they push, stick with your answer or throw in a little “No quiero” or “No puedo” as a follow-up.
Some simple responses include:
- No, thank you – No, gracias
- No, I can’t – No, no puedo
- No, thank you. I don’t want to – No, gracias. No quiero
Saying no and setting that boundary doesn’t need to be complicated. Sometimes we go into a conversation and we get overwhelmed thinking we won’t know how to express this properly and respectfully. Realistically, simply saying no and refusing to budge on your answer is really all it takes. No sharp responses needed.
Protect You and Your Time
Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself. You are not being pushy or rude. If you can’t do something or simply don’t want to, it is absolutely okay to set a boundary and say no to protect yourself, your mental health, and your time.
Don’t freak out about hurting someone’s feelings by saying no. Remember, we’re trying to respectfully set boundaries. There should be no rude exchanges here. The boundary is here to protect you, and it should be simple to set. If the phrase is too complicated to say and you forget it or get overwhelmed when trying to say something, then that isn’t the right phrase for you.
5 Phrases to Respectfully Set Boundaries
On that note, here are 5 simple phrases that you can say to someone in Spanish to set a boundary. Remember to respond gently but firmly.
- No I can’t, I have to work – No puedo, tengo que trabajar
- No, I can’t, I don’t have time – No puedo, no tengo tiempo
- No I can’t, I’m very busy right now – No puedo, estoy muy ocupado/a ahora
- No thank you, I don’t like it very much – No gracias, no me gusta mucho
- No thank you, I have other commitments right now – No gracias, tengo otros compromisos ahora
These phrases can help you establish boundaries respectfully while learning a new language and navigating Spanish conversations. Remember, taking care of yourself by setting boundaries is essential for maintaining healthy language learning experiences.
I hope these tips prove helpful as you navigate conversations and language learning in Spanish! If you need further assistance or additional information, let me know in the comments! You may also find this post on language learning without an app helpful.
Happy learning!
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